What would it mean for you if you truly loved your life? I mean unabashed, untethered love. The kind of love that has you jumping out of bed in the morning with a smile on your face and enthusiasm in your heart.
You may think that it is not possible to feel that way about your life, but it is. If you are like me, then you spend a lot of time doing things that you would rather not do. You know, those things that someone NEEDS to do so it might as well be you. For me it is the never-ending pile of laundry (I do not even understand where it is coming from.)
I have a few things that have helped me love my life. No, I did not win the lottery or lose 30 pounds, though both of those events would massively increase my love fest with life. The first thing I did was learn to say no to those things that I really did not want to do. Let me explain. I spent a good portion of my adult life feeling obligated to make everyone else happy by volunteering when I did not want to and going to events that did not interest me or fit into my life. I did these things out of habit and because I thought that was what adulting was all about…boredom and doing things I did not want to do.
I was so wrong.
My actions were rooted in people pleasing, and I cannot think of a worse reason to be unhappy.
You should never feel obligated to say yes to every request or demand placed on your life. If it is not the right fit for you, then do not do it. There will always be activities and opportunities that may not set your soul on fire, that is ok. It is a part of life. What I want you to realize is that you have much more control over your happiness than you give yourself credit for. Telling someone no is not a sin. It is an obligation to yourself. You have control over the activities and relationships that dominate most of your time.
The second thing I did was up my self-care. I rested when I needed to rest and exercised when I needed that too. I made my physical care a priority. That is a game changer. It is not vanity or selfishness, it is learning how to feel your best. It is a lot easier to love your life when you feel good about being you.
Thirdly, I started practicing journaling. It may sound odd, but it totally worked. Everyday I took a few minutes to write down my goals. For me, goals are a list of affirmations that start with I am. For example, I am smart and I am patient. I also journal about those things that I am grateful for and why. For example, I am so grateful for my body because it allows me to be present with my children. You get the idea.
The point is that you can learn to love your life. Yes, I said learn. It is a skill you can develop. Part of that learning is learning to make yourself a priority and learning what fits in your life and what does not. It is not selfish. Far from it. It is creating a life that you love.