Pain Can Be A Powerful Teacher

Everyone living the human experience has dealt with pain. We have been hurt by other people, some well-meaning, some not. Add to that, the pain we cause ourselves and we end up spending a great deal of our precious time reeling in our own suffering. 

In my life I have learned a thing or two about pain and suffering and the lessons that accompany them. Some of those lessons were so visceral, going so deep into my soul that I knew I would be changed forever. This type of pain hurts so badly that it changes the core of who you are and how you interpret the world.

How do you recover from pain, suffering, and the trauma of it all?

I am not a therapist. Please do not let my words hinder you from seeking professional help when you need it. I do. 

Rather, I am speaking to you as someone that has felt intense personal pain, loss and suffering. One could even call it trauma. The good news is I am on the road to wellness. My healing journey isn't over, far from it. But I am mindful that every day brings growth and the opportunity to learn from my experiences. 

At first, I fought against it. It was as if I didn't acknowledge it then it wouldn't be real. Denial at its finest. That did not last long. My pain was determined to rise to the surface and face me. For my own wellness, it could not stay buried under my stoic nature. 

Then I entered into what I would call despair. Not depression. They are different things. Despair is pain so deep that you do not see a way out of it. You are lost in the darkness, blinded by the pain and grappling for a way out and searching for an anesthetic. 

This is the ugly part. Letting yourself go there. Leaning in. Feeling it, all of it, and sometimes all at once. 

I have found that on the other side of despair is the peace of surrender and eventually some level of acceptance. Learning to surrender to the Divine plan and trusting that God has my back. That has been harder than it seems. I'm a fixer, but this time God has to fix me. I cannot. I'm learning to trust and learning the hard way. 

Don't get me wrong, I still have my ugly cry days.

But after I release what has risen to the surface, I surrender again. This is what I call acceptance. Accepting where I am and accepting my situation. Learning to step outside of my circumstances and observe the lesson. I have found that there is always a lesson if we have the bravery to look for it. Become a student of the pain. What is it here to teach me?

Through it all I have learned to trust my instincts. I have also learned that I cannot control other people and sometimes it is just best to let go. On the other side of pain there is empathy, humility and awareness. I can see other people's pain, because now I can see my own.

God is calling you higher. Do not be afraid to rise.

No matter what you are going through, please know that you can face your pain and come out of it a better version of yourself. I know it is scary, but be brave. Healing comes. Look for the lesson, look for the love. If we have the courage, we can take what we have learned and help others that are going through similar suffering. When we do that, we take the pain and suffering and turn into power and purpose.