Recently I’ve become an empty nester, and to say that this has been difficult for me would be a massive understatement.
I’ve spent most of my adult life consumed with the glory and struggles of motherhood. The countless baseball games and piano lessons kept me so busy that time just slipped through my grasping hands. I know that a major part of mothering is the day to day routine and care. But now that it’s all come to an end I’ve started asking myself some earnest questions.
Did I do enough? Did I do too much? Most days I felt so inadequate, and some days I still do. I worry that I didn’t teach them to take care of themselves. I worry that I didn’t prepare them for the challenges life can bring. I’ve learned a lot of hard lessons in life, but I’ve always tried to spare them from the ugliness in this world.
The most shocking part of it all is how quick and permanent it all is. In an instant my house was empty. There were no mounds of laundry, no rushing from event to event, and no music. I was not prepared for that kind of empty.
That emptiness and grief has become all consuming. Add to that the passing of my father and my mother’s battle with cancer, and I thought I might drown.
I’m certain that you are not unfamiliar with the burden of sadness. It’s so easy to get lost in that dark place, to inhabit it with every part of your being. But I’m here to remind you that you’re not alone.
There’s a tribe of women supporting and praying for you. I’m praying for you. It’s my hope that my story will help you tell your own.
Whenever you need a reminder that you can come back to the surface, think of Girl Be Brave. We’re all on this journey together.